Monday, October 08, 2007

Whined it up Wednesdays! -Baby Crack -

Welcome to the first edition of Whined it up Wednesdays! Today's fare comes from a new Mommy.

Dear S'mee,

I am expecting my first baby in December. Already my sister in law and Mother in law are giving me "helpful" parenting advice. One example is in their family pacifiers are not allowed. They want me to just nurse the baby each time he cries. They say this will help bond the baby whereas the pacifier will give the baby "Billy Bob Teeth" and too much dependence on something other than me. What did you do? What should I do?

Sign me,

P-O'd in Provo

Dear P-O'd,

In laws can be very helpful to be sure, however sometimes you need to let them know you are up to the task, whatever that task may be. Just remember they are your hubby's family and will be with you FOR EV ER! So play nice.

As far as I can recall, a pacifier won't cause damage to baby teeth or mouth development. But yeah, they become like Baby Crack. Back in the day I would have paid any amount of money to keep that crack in the house. The only exception is if your pediatrician suspects nipple confusion, in which case, stinks to be you, and the baby will be off all but one source for satisfaction.

Other than that, I think a baby will take the pacifier if and when they want. Babies have a way of calling the shots, and this is no exception. By the time they are a year old however, they are beginning to really like the pacifier. There are a couple of options depending on your preferences.

On their one year birthday, S'mee threw out all bottles, pacifiers, and yup even the sippy cups. My kids had learned by them to drink from a glass. The trick there is very little liquid at a time. But that's another post. They were not happy to be sans pacifier, but the habit left swiftly and after a looong week, we were fine. Really. Yeah. We were! (Be firm! You can do this!)

Another option is to wait until a certain age. A few months prior to that date you can begin telling your little one about the "ninny" faery, or whatever you call the danged thing. The faery comes on that date, takes all the pacifiers and leaves a treat of your deciding. All done. Kind of like the tooth faery.

Or you can let your child decide when to give it up. Although I have seen many a toddler with a pacifier dangling from their mouth. This is hard to speak through (and yes, this does cause speech delays) and also the older they are the more difficult it will be to give it up. So you may want to think about how much your little guy is depending and using his pacifier, if he should be learning words and talking, and just how difficult this habit will be for him to break.

As far as depending on someone other than you for all his needs, well, um, yeah he's going to need to do that! This is where daddy, gramma, siblings, the dog and that irritating lady at church come in handy. Your child will learn to depend on, and trust, all kinds of folks. You don't want him screaming with fear every time your sister in law comes over now do you? Tell her he needs to bond with her also.

So there you go. O.k. people, I need more letters! Let see that s'mee mail fill up! That's it for this week.

add to sk*rt


chronicler said...

yep I agree! The pacifier goes when the bottle does! then you don't have a five year old with one or a 14 YO for that matter!

s'mee said...

LOL we have been hangin' out at the same places!

The Pea said...

As a midwife in training I am learnign alot about lactation and nursing. So here is my two cents!! As long as you get breastfeeding well established before you give the pacifier you will be just fine. Alot of new mommies will try to introduce a binky too soon and then that "almost" always leads to nipple confussion and headaches for mom. for most babies nursing is not as easy as it seems and it will be hard for the first week or so. Other than that the best advise I give to new moms is to never forget YOU ARE THE MOM!!!

s'mee said...

Thanks Pea! Thank is awesome information from a great source!