bad news good news

It's been a while since I've had anything substantial enough to write about. Life got a bit busy with mundane things and trying to finish those new year's goals. A bedroom is completely bare and ready for new carpet, etc. Anywho, yesterday brought all kinds of excitement in to our home.

My mother in law fell while trying to grab the newspaper from the sidewalk. She ended up with a crushed (the radius bone directly above her wrist is broken and in several pieces), bit through her tongue so severely that she need stitches across the width, and 'road rash' on her very swollen chin, nose and forehead. There were a few other injuries and she is being well taken care of. I anticipate some surgery, but we're still waiting to hear what. Last night they sent her home with a temporary splint/cast, meds and instructions to meet with an orthopedist today. It was somewhat of a family reunion as, as many of us as could physically be there, we went to see her at the hospital and then at their home. Phone calls were made to check on her all night long and before we left, a couple of sweet moments. It was tender to see my mother in law surrounded by her two sons, hands laid on her head and pronounce a Priesthood Blessing of health and healing, comfort and some Divine guidance. Then we sat and prayed as we listened to those same to sons give a Priesthood Blessing to their father. My father-in-law made note that this was the first time his sons blessed him, and there were a few tears shed. The room fell silent for a moment or two.

Earlier in the day, while we were still in the ER, we got a call from The Scholar. She (along with the other kids) had inquired about gramma and was hoping for good news. "Nothing yet, but we'll let you know." Then about 45 minutes later she called again, this time with news of her own.

The Scholar is our youngest. When she was in 4th grade she learned about universities and she decided she wanted to go. From that point on she worked like a tornado to earn her way into greater and greater challenges academically. She (since kindergarten) never received anything other than an "A" and graduated high school with a 5.0. (Back in my day 4.0 was tops, but with weighted classes I guess you can earn more.) She earned a scholarship to the UC Irvine and "BY-U". She went to the BY-U and for the last few years has continuously worked at least two jobs, held church callings, kept physically fit, had some fun, all the while keeping her studies up.

She went in as a Sophomore and was going to graduate a year early when her mentors encouraged her to take and extra year and add more classes to her resume. She followed their advise and has continued to work 2 jobs, plus teach high school, keep up on her church calling, run a couple of marathons, fly around the country to present her papers, study, and maintain her sanity. She had come to the point where grad school was looming on the horizon, tests were taken, papers have been written, applications sent. The waiting has been difficult for her. But yesterday the waiting began to end. She called us with the news that her first application reply has come in.

She was accepted to and received a full ride scholarship to Duke University!

She informs us that this was not her first choice and that she is still hoping for acceptance and equal offers from a few other schools, but "This is a good back up plan." which is classic thinking for this dynamo of a kid who loves learning. A text was sent out to all of the siblings and each one in turn sent back love and exuberant congratulations, so happy and pleased with their little sister who has truly worked for all she has earned.

Today I am grateful for family who gather in good times and in bad, cushioning the falls and celebrating the triumphs that come to us all.

College Applications Update: As of today she has also been accepted and given a full scholarship to The Claremont Colleges, although she informs us the deal from Duke was substantially better, her specific program, full health care, yearly stipend, etc.. Please keep fingers crossed for her #1 choice! Thanks

adventures in sewing!

The previous green curtains were atrocious! We found a discount fabric store and searched for bargains. We found too many fabrics we wanted but let the budget make the final decision.

For $3.oo a yard, #5 loved this crinkly semi sheer, at 52 wide, it was a deal and a half! We decided that if we placed the fabric on the horizon rather than it's intended vertical we could get away with about 1/3 the fabric! Too add length and interest she picked out another piece of lightweight, but darker and with a bit of texture fabric at $4.99 per yard. One yard was all we needed. The base fabric is a deep brown with black circles randomly placed all over...really cool!

She wanted to tie the curtains up with pearls, chains, ribbons and whatever else she could find, so I added button holes to the top. Clipped to the cafe rings and between she and the best friend they looked so much better than what she had before. Also, even with the semi sheer weight, they are opaque enough to provide much needed privacy from the neighbors!

Just a reminder of the loveliness that was their love seat! E-gads! We shopped Craigs list and couldn't find a sofa any cleaner or the appropriate size...well actually we did, but the $50.00 they wanted for it was ridiculous! We found a second sofa, but it was in another city, weighed about 345 lbs. and in addition to the $15.00 price tag they wanted another $20.00 for delivery. um no.

So while we were at the fabric store we found a mushroom gray upholstery fabric for (get this!) $2.00 a yard! For $20, we had a nearly new piece of furniture! Can you believe it's the same couch? The small rug was a miracle find at $10.00 and with the exact mushroom, brown and beige we needed! Whoo hoo!
So there you have it. The 5 day transformation!

the Art

#5 loves contemporary and abstract art. She found some pieces that spoke to her and asked her best friend who was also visiting and myself if we would join her in making some art for the walls in the living room. The walls as shown in the post prior, were empty. The only art in the house was a poster print of Jesus and another of a temple, both green from too much sun exposer, one placed in the kitchen and the other in the hallway.

The first photo is #5's first attempt at painting. She was disappointed in it, although I really liked it. To me, it seemed somewhat cosmic and it makes me want to look at it for a while to see all the things moving in it. I liked it and so did the other girls in the house, so we talked her into keeping it and putting it up.

The second one is an abstract of the First Vision. She wanted something religious in the way of a painting, so this is what I came up with.

The third painting is just another abstract using a combination of elements that were in some of the other pieces we were doing. I wasn't sure she would like this, as I did it while she was working. Turns out she thought it was great. Who knew?

This fourth one turned out to be her favourite however, again, I wasn't sure she would like it at all. Later on I will explain how we changed/recycled/converted an old bookcase with poetry books, but with that in mind I made this collage using pieces from the books she had and also a bit of paint, a photograph from National Geographic, and ink. The quote on the base says: "de gustibus non est disputandum" or " there is no accounting for taste" in Latin, which she thought was hilarious.

The next one is based with text poetry from the books, with small pieces flying up and away into the light stream. This one got approval as well. I guess I should say there was one painting that needed to be reworked to make the cut, I thought so as well, and also one painting (ugh, that I neglected to photograph!) that she chose to hang in her room instead of the living area.

The last one was done by her best friend. It's a copy from one of #5's favourite artists, and although I do not know the artist's name the title of the painting was "Temple". Her best friend took almost two entire days copying this to almost perfection. I am sure the artist would be hugely flattered. It was amazingly close.

Before

yikes. This is what I have been up to the past week. Seems #5 needed some changes in her life. Part of those changes meant dealing with a less than responsive (or responsible for that matter) landlord and manager for the small BY-U approved housing. Took a bit of doing but I think we are making some head way.

Then there was the matter of the condition of the interiors. Not being allowed to paint over the dead flat bright hospital white walls that have been neglected (for several years by the look of them), we opted for the things we could change.

This first photo is of the front door as you face the street. Note that the t.v. is placed on a dresser. Normally I would think, "O.k. clever. We can use the dresser as extra storage and as a t.v stand." Alas, no. This dresser has been held together by unknown forces for far too long! The drawer fronts actually just balance on their frames, one small move and the whole front falls off! (The collection of odds and ends on the floor were my fault...thrift store bargains, more on them later)

This second photo shows the lovely thin to thread bare curtains, broken windows that cannot be secured and are directly in line with the drive way and walk way access to the back house. Neighbors, the mailman, and any visitors have a direct view into the house at any time of the day! How convenient! It also shows the best of the two couches, this one actually a love seat with holes in the seats, thus the yellow sheet, which as most throws or slip covers has a tendency to shift during use. Note the small foot stool. There are two of these, I think they are cast offs from a glider rocker, as they both glide. The good thing is they are surprisingly comfortable, the height is good and the cushion is bearable. Behind the love seat are two book cases. The one on the right holds two of the girls' dvd collections and on the base shelf, one gal's nursing books. The other shelf on the left houses #5's books, well some of her books. That book case it also very wobbly and whenever you remove a book the entire shelf lists one way or the other and you need to steady it, lest it collapse in a heap. There is a "Medusa" lamp, which the girls bought together because there was no lighting in the house prior to the purchase. They didn't really like it, but for $20.00 it was a deal. In the left corner, not shown, is another bookcase #5 brought with her, also filled to the brim with her books; and a hanging wind chime that belongs to her roommate... the one thing said roommate insisted stay exactly where it is, all else we could do what we would.

The third photo shows what I dubbed the SLC Airport couch. It had a very firm (read hard) and very shallow seat and all it was lacking was baggage claim and/or the pleather roping to guide you to your terminal. That was our beginning.

The last photo is one final look at the love seat for later comparison. We decided something had to be done about the seating in this house. No one ever sat on the Airport couch because of it's complete lack of comfort, so the girls dismantled it and stored it inside a hall closet.

I got a problem.

Alrighty then. Perhaps we should just read this in the Church Lady voice and be done with it.

Today's subject: Sex.

(now, evidently,soon to be former) New York Governor Eliot Spitzer and US Girls.

First, the Governor. It's not surprise that a career politician, one who builds that career on "moral" standards, has been caught with a prostitute. It's not a surprise that our tax dollars were paying for all this $1000.00 per hour service. It's not a surprise that the spouse stands beside this politician and says they will work on the marriage. I understand there are marriages where this has happened and that, yes, it can be repaired, my point is that this man's act was for recreation, not an emotional outburst or momentary madness.

Why am I not surprised that this is being played out in t.v. and radio as a common "mistake". Last evening there was an L.A. radio host who said all this could be avoided if prostitution were legal. Really? This is the problem? Evidently. According to this host, men are men, and men need variety and will cheat if they don't get permission to do so. He states that no man should even think about marriage until he is well into his 30s, and then only if he has been with many many women. He even went so far as to suggest those women be from different cultures, countries, etc.... juuuuust to try all he can. Hmm.

It's true that this host felt sorry for the wife, the kids, but in reality they should have seen it coming and this, he explained, is why women always forgive the men who go off to prostitutes. It has nothing to do with intimacy, it's just sex. This, according to his program, was excuse enough. The whole "Boys will be boys!" rule.

Interesting. I married a man; not an animal. I am offended to think that people are just blithely sitting by without protesting this statement that all men are beasts, and will and should conduct themselves without control or self discipline.

The entire program, from I can tell by going back this morning and listening to sound bites, has to do with his agenda at getting prostitution legalized, after all Nevada has figured it out. Legalize it, monitor it, and everyone can be safe while breaking their vows.

One of his guests was a former Hollywood madam and she agreed with all he had to promote. Lovely.

Essentially, because it was with a prostitute, everyone should be o.k. with this. I'm not even talking about the tax money, the laws, the dignity that was destroyed because of this. Heck why should we bother with that? Why is no one bothered that a "leader" has once again broken the trust of the American people? Because we have come to expect it.

Then we have the new report that 1 in 4 girls aged 14 - 19 are infected with an STD. Is this alarming, or is this too, normal human behaviour? "We can't stop people from having sex, teens are gonna have sex!" That's the thinking, right? I have a lot of problems with this study.

I find the timing amazing. Consider all the controversy lately about vaccines. Darn those moms anyway! Now, just when we have a handle on another vaccine, all these moms are wiggin' out and wondering if they should just blindly go forth as we have been trained to do. Or, maybe we need to stop and think a minute about it. So out comes a scare tactic to reinforce the need for a vaccine.

Doesn't anyone wonder if this is another Thalidomide ? Does it concern anyone else that we are vaccinating girls during puberty? Does it occur to anyone that we don't have any concrete long term studies on how this will affect their reproductive health later? Back in the day "the pill" was a new thing, a "hope", for women every where because heck, we were gonna have sex anyway, right? It was a band aide that was supposed to put everyone at ease.

The problem is that it is just that, birth control, not pregnancy prevention. We still get pregnant, it's just the birth that has become controlled. Back in the day no one knew personally of a women who was actually considered "barren". It almost seemed biblical. No one heard of anyone going to get help with fertilization; that was rare. Now, swing a cat and hit a couple who have fertility issues. Could the fact that we all have succumbed to the chemical cures that we are forgetting to connect the dots?

It's easier to just take a pill, to get a vaccine, than to do what it takes to avoid things we are not ready for. So let's all march our young girls down and get them vaccinated against a preventable disease. Yes, preventable.

Another problem I have with this report is the "girls only" angle. Are these girls born with STD? No, and the study implies (rightly so) that they have had sex. But with other girls or were there boys involved as well? If so, then how many boys have STD? Why aren't we concerned about warning them? The answer they are giving us is, that with the boys, there is rarely physical evidence or signs, with girls there is. O.k., but still, shouldn't there be something said about both genders? Shouldn't we be worried about the boys too?

How about that "black girl" stat? I tell you, I'm not black and I am furious over this. Where were these studies taken? In large cities. Were there 50 white girls and 50 black girls studied and they found these stats from that data? Were the girls completely honest? There are too many variables. Maybe it's not even 1 out of 4 girls. Did they test girls from all kinds of families, neighborhoods, classes, races, religions, regions, etc. etc. etc? Or perhaps the control group they chose could bend the outcome. Anyone who has taken a high school math class can see how stats can be bent.

On a hot day, give every teen in a crowd their choice of Pepsi or Water. Count how many teens are wearing black shirts. Count how many kids in that crowd wearing black shirts choose the Pepsi. Chances are the conclusion can be drawn that teens who drink Pepsi have a tendency to wear black shirts. Black can be a sign of Goth or depressed behaviour, i.e. Pepsi causes depression in teens. Forget the fact that 99% of the teens in the high school across the street wear black as a "cool" colour choice and that most teens enjoy a soda on a hot day. Stats can be skewed.

I'm a little ticked here. Tell the world that 1/4th of all your girls are sleeping around and spreading disease. Scare the crap out of everyone. Don't worry about the future outcome, that's why we have lawyers. Assume your children are idiots and without self control. Have them punched up with chemicals to avoid a disease that can be avoided completely. Make some pharmaceutical companies some cold hard cash. What other choice do you have?

It's easy. Talk to your kids. Both genders. Tell them who they are. Tell them they are worth more. Tell them they deserve more. Tell them how and why to wait. Expect more. Trust them to do just that. Educate them with as much information as you can. Give them some credit for being more than animals.

It's a cruel, cruel summer....

Yeeeowwwch! Did you feel that growing pain? (That's gonna leave a mark.)

After working her first job, #5 has learned a few things. Taxes aren't fun. "Training" and work is fun, but being paid less for the same work is not. "Bosses" fudge, stretch the truth, or otherwise flat out lie to you so that they appear to be your advocate when in reality they are just trying to get the best deal for the(ir) business, too bad you got the not so truthful end of the deal. There are no 40 hour a week - even during the summer- minimum wage jobs in Utah. There are no such things as promises from management. Good luck getting 20, those ahead of you will be grabbing all the hours they can because they have already learned these truths. Paying for a uniform can reduce one's earnings to a check that is embarrassing to cash: one penny. After you work next week for the same "training" pay scale, "the rest of your uniform monies will be taken out", thus a huge possibility of you receiving another embarrassing check. (There is a reason everyone has worked for this company and now does not.)

She has also learned that girls who have parents who pay their bills have no idea how much their bills are, they "just send the check to Dad and he takes care of it... your share is on the table..." and then they forget all about it. Thus the inquiries on said bills before signing on is about $80.00 more than anticipated. Living in the basement, your room gets neither heat nor cooling due to the layout of the venting situation. So when it gets warm enough up stairs they shut it off before you get it and the same is true for cooling. Whether or not you want cable or will use it, you will be charged for it; even when we asked you if you did or did not need cable and told you it was o.k. that you didn't and would be excluded from the agreement.

The really good friends who share the room above you aren't really that good of friends and now you know why they say "good roomies are hard to find". You have become the sounding board.

Life as a grown up is different than anticipated. (But still fun.)

(Let's hope that second job working for the MTC is a tad better. Or at least a more true picture of what the management painted prior to hiring.)

and you thought it only happened in the movies...

So this morning is "wake up and go get more boxes day". Last night #5 came into the front room and announced: "I want to say thanks for ALL THE STUFF YOU GUYS GAVE ME OVER THE LAST FEW YEARS! Good grief! I have too much stuff! Promise you'll never buy me anything else...EVER! lol!" Then about ten minutes later she came in with her list of things she will need once she is in her new apartment. Thor just looked at her and said, "You're on your own kid. We ain't buying you anything ANYMORE!" lol.

It was about 11:30 and we can hear the new washing machine working up to a "situation" (read: Houston, we have a "situation"). A loud thumping noise soon became a loud Wham WHam WHAM WHAM WHAM WHAM with every female on the premises meeting at the huge white fixture of doom. We all burst out laughing when we saw the machine lid bouncing up and down in a mighty rhythm trying to expel all THREE foaming pillows #5 had shoved in there for one last cleansing before the trip. "Well, it seems they puff when you wash 'em." said #5, "Brilliant, Sherlock" came #3's reply and as we were all trying to save the hallway from wreck and ruin with suds and laughter #5 again (remember this is the smart one in the family) proclaims, "They really soak up the water don't they? I thought they'd shrink and get all flat." LOL! I mean really, how did she pass all those science AP exams? (Note to the BY-U School of Science: Stop requesting she change her major! English for her is looking the better choice!) We ended up with a puffy bathtub of foam and eventually ran each pillow separately through a spin cycle. After all the commotion she mentioned there were still things to learn on the last day before you leave home. QUICK! Someone get a recording device of some kind - there's a college freshman who admits she has something to learn! lol