Wednesday, March 12, 2008

I got a problem.

Alrighty then. Perhaps we should just read this in the Church Lady voice and be done with it.

Today's subject: Sex.

(now, evidently,soon to be former) New York Governor Eliot Spitzer and US Girls.

First, the Governor. It's not surprise that a career politician, one who builds that career on "moral" standards, has been caught with a prostitute. It's not a surprise that our tax dollars were paying for all this $1000.00 per hour service. It's not a surprise that the spouse stands beside this politician and says they will work on the marriage. I understand there are marriages where this has happened and that, yes, it can be repaired, my point is that this man's act was for recreation, not an emotional outburst or momentary madness.

Why am I not surprised that this is being played out in t.v. and radio as a common "mistake". Last evening there was an L.A. radio host who said all this could be avoided if prostitution were legal. Really? This is the problem? Evidently. According to this host, men are men, and men need variety and will cheat if they don't get permission to do so. He states that no man should even think about marriage until he is well into his 30s, and then only if he has been with many many women. He even went so far as to suggest those women be from different cultures, countries, etc.... juuuuust to try all he can. Hmm.

It's true that this host felt sorry for the wife, the kids, but in reality they should have seen it coming and this, he explained, is why women always forgive the men who go off to prostitutes. It has nothing to do with intimacy, it's just sex. This, according to his program, was excuse enough. The whole "Boys will be boys!" rule.

Interesting. I married a man; not an animal. I am offended to think that people are just blithely sitting by without protesting this statement that all men are beasts, and will and should conduct themselves without control or self discipline.

The entire program, from I can tell by going back this morning and listening to sound bites, has to do with his agenda at getting prostitution legalized, after all Nevada has figured it out. Legalize it, monitor it, and everyone can be safe while breaking their vows.

One of his guests was a former Hollywood madam and she agreed with all he had to promote. Lovely.

Essentially, because it was with a prostitute, everyone should be o.k. with this. I'm not even talking about the tax money, the laws, the dignity that was destroyed because of this. Heck why should we bother with that? Why is no one bothered that a "leader" has once again broken the trust of the American people? Because we have come to expect it.

Then we have the new report that 1 in 4 girls aged 14 - 19 are infected with an STD. Is this alarming, or is this too, normal human behaviour? "We can't stop people from having sex, teens are gonna have sex!" That's the thinking, right? I have a lot of problems with this study.

I find the timing amazing. Consider all the controversy lately about vaccines. Darn those moms anyway! Now, just when we have a handle on another vaccine, all these moms are wiggin' out and wondering if they should just blindly go forth as we have been trained to do. Or, maybe we need to stop and think a minute about it. So out comes a scare tactic to reinforce the need for a vaccine.

Doesn't anyone wonder if this is another Thalidomide ? Does it concern anyone else that we are vaccinating girls during puberty? Does it occur to anyone that we don't have any concrete long term studies on how this will affect their reproductive health later? Back in the day "the pill" was a new thing, a "hope", for women every where because heck, we were gonna have sex anyway, right? It was a band aide that was supposed to put everyone at ease.

The problem is that it is just that, birth control, not pregnancy prevention. We still get pregnant, it's just the birth that has become controlled. Back in the day no one knew personally of a women who was actually considered "barren". It almost seemed biblical. No one heard of anyone going to get help with fertilization; that was rare. Now, swing a cat and hit a couple who have fertility issues. Could the fact that we all have succumbed to the chemical cures that we are forgetting to connect the dots?

It's easier to just take a pill, to get a vaccine, than to do what it takes to avoid things we are not ready for. So let's all march our young girls down and get them vaccinated against a preventable disease. Yes, preventable.

Another problem I have with this report is the "girls only" angle. Are these girls born with STD? No, and the study implies (rightly so) that they have had sex. But with other girls or were there boys involved as well? If so, then how many boys have STD? Why aren't we concerned about warning them? The answer they are giving us is, that with the boys, there is rarely physical evidence or signs, with girls there is. O.k., but still, shouldn't there be something said about both genders? Shouldn't we be worried about the boys too?

How about that "black girl" stat? I tell you, I'm not black and I am furious over this. Where were these studies taken? In large cities. Were there 50 white girls and 50 black girls studied and they found these stats from that data? Were the girls completely honest? There are too many variables. Maybe it's not even 1 out of 4 girls. Did they test girls from all kinds of families, neighborhoods, classes, races, religions, regions, etc. etc. etc? Or perhaps the control group they chose could bend the outcome. Anyone who has taken a high school math class can see how stats can be bent.

On a hot day, give every teen in a crowd their choice of Pepsi or Water. Count how many teens are wearing black shirts. Count how many kids in that crowd wearing black shirts choose the Pepsi. Chances are the conclusion can be drawn that teens who drink Pepsi have a tendency to wear black shirts. Black can be a sign of Goth or depressed behaviour, i.e. Pepsi causes depression in teens. Forget the fact that 99% of the teens in the high school across the street wear black as a "cool" colour choice and that most teens enjoy a soda on a hot day. Stats can be skewed.

I'm a little ticked here. Tell the world that 1/4th of all your girls are sleeping around and spreading disease. Scare the crap out of everyone. Don't worry about the future outcome, that's why we have lawyers. Assume your children are idiots and without self control. Have them punched up with chemicals to avoid a disease that can be avoided completely. Make some pharmaceutical companies some cold hard cash. What other choice do you have?

It's easy. Talk to your kids. Both genders. Tell them who they are. Tell them they are worth more. Tell them they deserve more. Tell them how and why to wait. Expect more. Trust them to do just that. Educate them with as much information as you can. Give them some credit for being more than animals.

add to sk*rt


chronicler said...

Well, I think you've defined the wrold view of the sexes pretty well. females are willing to do anything to capture the male, and males, well they're animals that are control by their need to continue the species.

Of, course it isn't that simple. However, the liberal minded evolutionists treat it that way. We do not elevate ourselves beyond carnal desires. It is a very unfortunate statement that even those with whom we share moral convictions do not agree that we need to train up a child to make good choices and be responsible for their actions.

S'mee said...

Chronicler, thanks. You got it, perfectly.

1stdaughter said...

I agree with your post. Its been some of the most difficult struggles for me personally and with my now 1 year old son. All the girls in our family have had difficulties getting pregnant and who really knows why. All they want to do is prescribe some more drugs to see if that doesn't "help" the situation. So, of course when I say no and go completely all natural, I get pregnant. Who knew?

Then onto Jace. Right now because we are so poor we are living on a lot of government assistance, including health insurance. Well, of course one of their stipulations for continuing it is that Jace be "current" on all his vaccinations. I will NOT subject Jace to all of that. There was finally a case just last week where they stated that a little girl did get autism from vaccines. So, do you really think I want to pump him up on a bunch of crap? I wouldn't let him sit in a room full of chain smokers, so why would I shove his body full of metal and known toxins? Its sad, and what am I to do? Chances are in a few months we will be without insurance and praying that none of us get too sick.

THanks for the post.

S'mee said...

#1, your best resource is your mom. She has a lot of wisdom and many ways around situations like this. I bet she could give you some great advice on how to avoid the vaccines without losing insurance.

in the immortal words of our society:
""maybe" is the new rationale."


Desi said...

I found your blog through MMW and I couldn’t agree with you more on the aspect of how they portray girls when it comes to sexuality or that we need to be teaching morals to our children, but…

I have to say I am seriously considering the vaccine for my daughter. Not for the STD aspect but for the cancer aspect! I have had two friends that have had cervical cancer, one a wonderful LDS mom of four kids that almost left her children without a mother. If I can do something that will prevent my daughter from getting cancer then I'm going to do it 100%. My oldest is 9 so I will be watching and studying a lot over the next couple of years before making that decision.

I also agree that we are over medicating our society, but at the same time I believe that Heavenly Father has given us the knowledge to create some of those medicines to help people. We just have to use our best judgment as to what it right and wrong for us and our families.

Anyway, that’s just my two cents on the issue. Thanks for the thought provoking topic.

S'mee said...

Desi! Welcome! Thank you for commenting, I really appreciate it.

I agree that cervical cancer is scary and that anything we can do to prevent it is a good idea. I like that you are willing to do the research, wait for an appropriate age and then make that decision with her.

I am not anti drug or treatment, I *am* concerned that too many of us just reach for a medication before seeking alternative methods. I'm not talking about herbs and sitting under a full moon, just not rushing to pop a pill for every little thing, which obviously cancer is not.

Heavenly Father did give us genius people who do marvelous things with medicine and treatments. He also has given us parents and brains of our own, trusted us with His children, and I think sometimes we forget that we can do a lot ourselves.

Again, thank you for commenting. Please drop back soon. And I see by your bio you are in CA. I would enjoy inviting you to our next SoCAL Blogger get together. If you are interested, drop a line in the S'mee Mail (upper right on the blog.) and we'll notify you next time.

Anonymous said...

I came here via MMW too :) And I have to add my 2 cents in agreement with Desi. I'm a 36 yr old mother of three that had cervical cancer at the ripe old age of 33. I am a married monogamous (all of both our lives) LDS woman...try to explain that to your Dr when she just gave you the news that you have an STD..."what ever you have to tell yourself to feel better honey" is the answer I got...needless to say I'm a little leery of the medical world (and I'm an RN) and I too will be watching very closely over the next 10 years how the studies go with this vaccine for my daughter. BUT if I were faced with the choice this very day you can bet that my daughter would be the first in line for it! These things are not just made up to make geeky researchers and big business CEOs wealthy. Entire lists of diseases have been wiped out by vaccinations! How many more minutes of thought do you need before you protect your child with something that the benefits FAR out way the *possible* downside? I thought through and researched absolutely everything that went into my childrens' bodies and chose to follow the prescribed vaccination routine--nothing blind about my choice. And I dare go out on a limb and suggest that most mothers fall into a similar category. I get nothing from those advertisements that encourage blind following. In fact, I think it very loudly proclaims one's responsibility for personal awareness! As far as infertility goes--I think you are a little hyped up with not much data to back yourself up. I had infertility problems runs in the family...multiple generations...I think what was most rare "back then" was women actually talking about it like they do today. In the circles of those who were "barren" there were more than enough. Statistics have not taken such a sharp upward turn--just the open talk.

I appreciate your views--and really wish I could communicate my views as well as you do. We are not so far apart on opinions though. I agree with much of what you have to say :) Thanks for provoking my thought today and reminding me I'm not so mindless in my actions as sometimes it may seem.