Monday, September 18, 2006

from Chronicler, a penny for your thoughts...

18 September 2006

Complete the thought...

Never again in my life: will I forget who I really am; and that I control what happens to me.

When I was five: I was awakened from sleep, handed a butcher knife, hidden under a window, and eventually asked to run screaming from my home as I feared my mother's murder. Also the year I took my best school photo.

High School was: Less than fun. I just wanted it over. I learned quickly that High School was a defining moment in understanding true character in a person. High School was to be alone by choice. Jr. High, on the other hand, rocked!

I will never forget: when I was in 4th grade; I ran after my mom driving away from me, catching up to her as she stopped to tell me, "This isn't about you. Stop being such a baby. Go back to the house and live with Gramma. I don't want you in my life right now. I am leaving all of you leeches and I won't be back." and feeling she would never come back.

I once met: a few "famous" people. Not who/what I expected. On the other hand I have met some incredible non-famous folks who knocked my socks off with their amazing Spirit and go-to positive personalities.

There's this girl I know who: danced with this guy at a church dance and kept up very nicely thank you. (and was asked very politely to "not dance near him anymore as it made it look as if anyone can dance like this.")

By noon I'm usually: awake. I've been up for hours, but by noon I'm finally awake and personable. (I stole this line from Chronicler, but it fits perfectly. Perhaps we are sisters???)

Last night I: tried to get things done on the computer and otherwise in the house so that later on this week I won't need to -busy week ahead!

Next time I go to church: I will be acting in a way that will matter eternally.

What worries me most: That I am not worthy and may never be.

When I turn my head right, I see: Thor's desk, bookcases, and a piano covered with family photos.

When I turn my head to the left, I see: Book cases, a favorite photo by Jean Guichard, Little Man's calendar, and a wall that is indesperate need of painting!

You know I'm lying when: When I start to lie. I have been told by numerous people close to me that I CANNOT lie well, it's obvious from the first word out of my mouth that a "story" is coming. ugh, this does not bode well for surprises, or surprise parties.

If I was a character written by Shakespeare, I'd be: the jester who is secretly smart, and no one in the play ever gets it...only the audience figures it out.

By this time, next year: I hope to have caught up on a number of projects so that I can paint every day if I wish.

A better name for me would be: Contradiction

I have a hard time understanding: Math. And okra.

If I ever go back to school: I'll be amazed.

You know I like you if: If I go with you to lunch.

Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferarro are: Misused, Gifted, Ridiculous, & Not as important as some people think.

Take my advice, NEVER: think you aren't in control of your own destiny, life, situations. It's all about you. It's always ALL about you. And it's all beneficial to you, no matter what.

My ideal breakfast is: Burnt toast with real butter and real creamy hot chocolate; always with a side of warm memories.

A song I love, but do not have is: a recording of my brother singing Rainbow Connection. Which always makes me cry when I hear it, heck who am I kidding? I am tearing up right now just reading the words.

If you visit my hometown, I suggest: (my childhood home) you purchase real estate, any real estate. My current hometown, bring SPF45 and wait for the sunsets, and night views of the stars.

Why won't anyone: put the dishes away in the right place? I mean really people! They have gone in the same place for thirty years. This is your entire lifetime. Don't get me wrong, I am PLEASED that you emptied the dishwasher, but next time at least leave me a note telling me where you hide the colander!

If you spend the night at my house, DO: what makes you happy. Enjoy! Use what you like, eat what you want, stay for as long as you feel, dance in my living room, sing loudly.

I'd stop my wedding for: looking back on it, not much! Including the parental announcement stating their refusal to attend, mom's destroying of my dress, their acknowledgement of purposely losing all the required legal papers and/or documents, blood work etc.; and the fact that dad tried to pick a fight with Thor (and lost both in argument and the physical portion of the event, Sabotaging the reception and guest list only added to my determination and solidified that I was doing the right thing in marrying Thor. (did I mention we will be married 30 years this November?)

The world could do without: bugs -in my opinion. Exception being butterflies, dragon flies, and lady bugs.

I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: Are you kidding me? Death would come easily if given the choice of bug licking or taking a dirt nap.

My favorite blonde is: are, my two daughters, both of whom say they are not blondes anymore.

Paperclips are more useful than: say, rutabagas at any holiday festivity.

San Diego means: home. My childhood. The Zoo. When I was a girl you got in free if you were under the age of 16. I went every weekend with my brother. (again, stealing this line from Chronicler, but she said it best.) And I will place where the feelings from childhood are pleasant, good, and otherwise sweet to recall.

I stole this from my friend and sis Chronicler. You can steal it from me! I'd love to read your finishes.

add to sk*rt


chronicler said...

Oh wonderful! I am smiling ear to ear! Except of course when I read rainbow connection. Teary, teary there!

I love ya, sis.

heh. the secret word is hughz( hugs and huzza!)

Carrie said...

Do we have the same mom??? LOL! My parents tried to sabotage my wedding too, and then my marriage, and then my life with my daughter! That's why we had to make the hard decision to forever keep them out of our lives! I've only been married 3 1/2 years! You are definitely inspiration to keep going! 30 YEARS!! Congrats to you and your hubby!

BTW- LOVED the comment you left on my blog! Couldn't stop laughing! ;)

Thank you for sharing so much about you!

Maren said...

I stole this from Lisa, but have yet to write it up. Maybe tomorrow......

The stuff with your mom is heartbreaking. Not much else to say to that.

I would love to some day have lunch with you. That would mean so many good things to me. Most of all, that you like me *smile*. And that I am well and out of the house and having lunch somewhere. Maybe next November, Lisa and I have a tentative plan to meet in Oceanside and vacation. All good things to dream about and plan for.

Lisa M. said...

Smee, Smee, Smee

I just love Thor. Did you know that? Having never met him or chatted with him or any of that stuff, I just *know*

I wanted to have dinner with you once. *sniff* but no one else wanted to eat.

What a sad tragic event. *sniff*

That rainbow connection. *smile*

Love ya sis~

And yes, you and your sister.. will have to join Missy Maren and I, in Oceanside ...for lunch or dinner or both.


chronicler said...

When are you coming?????? If you come and don't call we will cry our eyes out! Which isn't good because we both look horrid after tears!

Soooo you better call!

s'mee and chronicler (we're both here at the bakery today!)

Carrie said...

*sniff* OCEANSIDE??? I'm totally jealous! I was born there! They have one of the BEST places for fish and chips on a pier! Can't remember the name though! :(

Have fun!

Lisa M. said...

Ah the BAKERY. I bet you peeps are having a GOOD ole time.

YEA! Oceanside! I have family there, and I am hoping that Maren's Family and mine can make it out there next fall. We know its a long ways off, but.. I am hoping E will be strong enough to make the trip then.

Of course we will call. (unlike some wilderbeasts who didn't call when THEY were here... ) *smirk*

Carrie, Carrie... there is much to learn about you!

Have you noticed, how odd it is, to start commenting to commenters while commenting on someone elses blog?


chronicler said...

I think it's cool Lisa. OUr own little neighborhood. :-) Wilderbeasts! Aaaack. I do remember calling. It wasn't you though. Yes, I am a dork!

Oooooo and E gets to come too! Yay. Added bonus!

Maren said...

Making this trip we have planned will be a wonderful thing on SO Many levels. I smile just thinking about it.

s'mee said...

Whew! I'm home again! Had a great time at the bakery-check Chronicler's site for a really cute cake she did. (to be served with a huge scoop of Cherry Garcia ice cream)

O.K.! Party at S'mee's! (i feel like a grown up blog! lol)

Carrie: Just remember, "It's all for your good!" click your heels three times and wait;one witch or another--somebody will do something to make it work out. Chronicler and I had some childhood time in O'side...we're all sand sisters!(Oooooh! who lives in a pineapple under the sea?)

Maren, AAAAaak! I am excited! Are you bringing Reilly?!!! That kid is sooo cute! Eat your vitamins and get better quickly so the fun can begin.(hearing Pink in my head...Iiiiiii'm comin' out so you betta get this pah-ty started...)

Lisa. Oh Miss Lisa. That whole eating dinner thing...women! I could go on, but I won't!

Yup I got the pick of the litter with Thor. Who could help but love a guy who grabs what was left of your wedding dress, informs your mother that his Gramma would sew it and do a better job of it, and then deck your dad on the way out of the house? (hearing Love At Home in my head)Ahhh, good times!

Have E start thinking superhero good thoughts and we'll see him there too!

As far as phone calls go...I need yur digits missy.

ALL:So here's the deal: Yak it up on my comments section, it makes me feel like people actually read this thing!
#2 Everybody party at the beach come spring/summer/fall/winter/MLKjr's B-day/Arbor Day/Flag Day... Pick any of the above.
#3 Pass around the numbers and when ya'all get close enough to poke each other with a stick, CALL!
(callin' out -around the world, are you ready for a brand new beat?)

O.k. nuff. peace out!

Maren said...

I'll bring some fun beach fare. What is traditional on your side of the country? Here I would go for some beach fries. Oh, it has been so long since I've even been to the beach here I don't remember what we used to traditionally eat. As a kid, it was always a packed lunck of cold cut sandwiches, cheap soda and Little Debbie Oatmeal cookies.

WHEN this trip pans out, it will be all of us--Jeff, Maren AND Reilly. I asked Reilly how to spell Party the other day and he said R E I L L Y (the only word he knows how to spell), but Yes, he does make the party. It made me laugh.

How close are you guys to Oceanside, or are you? Can I just tell you that I LOVE the beach. There is no where better, in my opinion.

s'mee said...

chonicler is about an hour, i am more like 3,but to either of us it is like driving with out eyes closed...could do it in our sleep!

my keyboard is broke, so y'all keep talkin' i'll try to keep up

Kimberly said...

I enjoyed reading this. A few of your thoughts really echoed mine and I cried and laughed as I got to know you a little better

melissa c said...

This was beautiful and so sad. I had no idea you've gone through so much. My heart really goes out to you.

I can better understand you comments on my blog about my dad. How hard. How heart renching to have your mom drive away, afraid she wouldn't come back.

That is something so unfair for a child to go through because any child will make it "about them". I would have been impossible not to.

I can't believe about your wedding. Thank heavens you married a super hero!.

I would really like to know you better. Thanks for sharing these experiences that are probably better forgotten (as if that is possible).

melissa c said...

P.S. Uh, I love the ocean...and food.... and a good cry..... and great friends....I think I'd like to invite myself along to Oceanside.

Carrie said...

He! He! Sponge Bob square pants!

Now I'm going to have that song stuck in my head!

Smee- I'm a clicking my heals! LOL!

Lisa- now you can learn a lot more about me! I did it! I stole this meme from Lisa and Smee! Although, I think yours are much cooler!

s'mee said...

One more reason to love Thor...he fixed my keyboard! yea!!!!

Kimberly and Melissa, I don't want to come off as a martyr or a victim, after all this time it is just what it is. Thanks for the support however; that's very sweet. And besides, all the funky in my life has made me the stable level headed psychopathetic person I am today! lol

And I guess an open invitation to all who want to get sand down their shorts! Be there or be square!

Maren said...

I left another comment here, but it's not showing up now. And I don't remember a thing I said. Something about traditional beach fare and this fun upcoming beach party. I LOVE beach fries. That's a given. As a kid, we always brought a packed lunch of cold cut sandwiches, cheap soda and Little Debbie's Oatmeal Cookies. There is nothing like the beach. It is my favorite place in the whole world. I have recently (in the past few years) discovered the coast of Maine and have had many delightful trips there. Such fun.

Marne said...

ok, so I refreshed and my earlier comment HAD shown up. Wierd 'puters.

Oh well. More comments are always more fun.

Maren said...

OK, so I am MAREN, not marne. MY my, I am having a computer day.

s'mee said...

Dear Maren, lol I have had days like this(most recently...maybe it's in the water?) The beach is my favorite place to be, and I think Chronicler feels the same. She has great food idea too, so together we'll just pig out!

I can't think of Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies without thinking about Honey I Shrunk the Kids...

chronicler said...

Those of you looking for a new post??? Nevermind, s'mee is off playing at Disneyland, again.

Can you tell I am very jealous???? Well, I am.